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FUNNY JOKES ONLINE |  |
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| 3 Chinese Proverbs A man was driving down the road, dating services when his car ran over a rock and blew out the tire. As he drove to the side of the road, he noticed a house. When www.mikeinbrazil.com he went to the door, and old mike's apartment Chinese man opened the door. 'May I spend the night?' asked the man. 'Yes,' the elder replied,' but don't touch my daughter, or I will unleash the 3 worst Chinese proverbs on you.' The guy is like yeah, whatever. So when he sees that daughter, she really hot, and they get it on. When he wakes up in the morning, he feels a www.milfhunter.com heavy weight on his chest. He opens his we live together eyes, and a rock is sitting there. On a card www bignaturals com it reads, 1st Chinese proverb: Heavy weight on mans chest. The guy gets dating services up and throws the rock out the window. On the tree out side there's a sign. It says, 2nd Chinese proverb: Rock tied to right testicle. The guy's thinking, great, and he jumps out the window cause he figures breaking a leg is better than 8th street latinas losing his right testicle. As he's falling, a sign is attached to the side of the house. It says, 3rd Chinese proverb: left testicle tied to bedpost. |
| Inexperienced Man A woman took an inexperienced man home one night. When they got to her apartment, she suggested that they try a 69. "What do you mean ?" he asked. Not knowing quite how to explain, she said "you put your head between my legs and I'll put my head between your legs" Still unsure but willing, he agreed. As soon as he got his head between her legs, she let out a rip-roaring fart. "What the hell was that?!?" he asked. "Oops! I'm so sorry! Let's try again" she said. On the second attempt the very same thing happened. The man immediately got up and started getting dressed. "Where are you going ?" she asked, to which he replied : "If you think I'm sticking around for 67 more of those, you're crazy! |
| Insurance Claim Larry's barn burned down, and his wife Susan called the insurance company. Susan told the insurance company, "We had that barn insured for fifty thousand, and I want my money." The agent replied, "Whoa there! Just a minute, Susan. Insurance doesn't work quite like that. We will ascertain the value of what was insured and provide you with a new barn of comparable worth." There was a long pause before Susan replied, "Then I'd like to cancel the policy on my husband." |
| How to Kill a Man Q: What's the best way to kill a man? A: Put a naked blonde and a six-pack in front of him. Then tell him to pick only one. |